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Tuesday, November 18, 2008

"This Too Shall Pass"

By Bethany Rule Vedder

Those four small words, "this too shall pass," have become one of my mama-mantras. When things get overwhelming, as they do often, I have one particular mom-friend who reminds me that This Too Shall Pass, no matter what it is that I'm wailing about. Sick kids, cats with fleas, tendinitis interrupting my race training, penny-pinching months, or whatever the drama-of-the-week happens to be.

That phrase is hard to write. Drama-of-the-week. Ouch: it's true! If it's not one thing it's another, and I don't think it's because I happen to get more than my share of dramatic events. It's more about how I approach life. Things To Be Conquered. Things To Be Checked Off. Things To Learn. Experiences to Have. I could go on, but I think you get my drift. I admit that I thrive on it. The conquering, the experiencing, the learning, and the checking off are all great! The drama is what needs toning down I think. I'm missing out on the daily enjoyment when the drama runs rampant. Perhaps you know what I mean?
Last week I had a trip to the vet, with my sick elderly cat, that was less than ideal. It involved rain, two strollers, two small boys, a bungee cord and a box, spilled snacks, tears, and broken crayons, just to name a few of the morning's elements. While the tape playing in the back of my mind saw the humor in it all, and believe me there was plenty, my drama-loving self couldn't let it be the melody of the day, just an undercurrent. I didn't enjoy the moment because I was waiting for it to pass so I could tell someone about it. That happens too often.
Ever catch yourself wishing a part of your child's development would just be over already, and then miss it as soon as it's gone? Sleeping through the night, talking, walking, you name it. Me too: and I lose out on so much that way! Motherhood, and life too, is all about the moments. The little things, the golden-delicious-last-bite-of-summer bits that I know are within reach far more often than I admit. This Too Shall Pass is as much about savoring those bits of life, drama and all, as it is about dragging myself through them. Simple I know, but a reminder I needed. Happy savoring!

Bethany Rule Vedder, is a coach, wife, sometimes sane mom to Douglas (2002) and Fynn (2006). Bethany is Editor in Chief, of Sanemoms.com. A site came from the belief that talking about what keeps us sane, and sharing our stories, is a wonderful way to validate and strengthen who we are as moms, and what it is that makes us strong. Bethany lives in Park Slope and is also a regular contributor of Hip Slope Mama.